There are these wonderful moments when I go about my day that I forget about the journey I am on. Moments where I am fully present in whatever I am doing and I feel “normal”. It happens while at work, and while having fun with my family and friends. (Brag alert here). Yesterday was one of those moments at track regionals when my boy (pictured below) came in first in long jump and is now headed to states! Oh yeah!
I am surprised when I have gone two or three hours without thinking about cancer. I wish (and hope) these spans will get longer but it is my reality. The part that I have improved on is that I don’t let my mind linger there.
The verse I am centering on today is 2 Cor 5:7 “we walk by faith, not by sight”. This verse has been true again and again over the past few months. For example, it did not surprise me when the doctor said the colon lit up on the PET/ CT scan. I have had changes in that area and I cannot gain weight so it seemed possible (by “sight”) for there to be cancer in the colon. I was hopeful it wasn’t but was prepared that it may be. As we know, the results showed NO CANCER in the colon. Again, a reminder “we walk by faith, not by sight”.
This Tuesday I have an appointment with a radiation oncologist to talk about possible radiation. I don’t feel settled about this treatment option – not because I am scared but because I want to know its purpose for my situation. In fact, what I really want is for him to provide me with scientifically-based research articles from highly respected medical journals on the effectiveness of radiation on my type of cancer. Since that is unlikely to happen, please pray that my friend Laurie and I ask the right questions and have God-centered intuition!
One more reminder – 2 Cor 5:7 “WE WALK BY FAITH, NOT BY SIGHT”