Revelations from a Stuck Car

Much to the amusement of my family, yesterday I got my car stuck in our driveway of all places.  The reason it happened is because I was too lazy to wipe off my windshield completely and sort of “lost track” of the driveway.  Humbling, since I scold Drake all the time (and just this past Sunday) for not wiping the snow completely off his windows before heading out. Richard was going to pull me out, so I figured no one would find out.   I forgot the boys both got out of school / college early yesterday.  They took full delight in razzing me.  I was thinking, “really, it is not that big of a deal”.  The important part of the lesson is how I handled the situation.  Months ago, an incident like this would have thrown me in a tizzy and sucked my joy for a few hours. Excessive, but true.  Now, I was able to realize I wasn’t meant to be out on the roads and just needed to cancel my appointment.

I envy all those laid-back, type B, personalities who couldn’t imagine getting worked up over something so trivial.   People who know me know that I have always been squarely in the Type A camp.  I have been mocked for my color coded planners, my organized clothes closet, and planning my kids’ summer activities by weekly themes.  So yes, I like to plan, organize, manage situations, and know the outcome from the beginning. While I am slowly being weaned of these traits, I do revert back now and then.  Yesterday, I was trying to wrap up my future in a neat little package.  My next oncologist appointment is only three weeks away and it is probably going to take that long for my voice to heal, so why not get that PET scan scheduled so we can have an answer about my future by Feb. 12th.  Apparently, this is not going to happen as insurance may balk if the PET scan is too soon from the last one.  So it looks like the end of February. This is a mixed blessing.  Most of me dreads this PET scan because this is where the rubber meets the road.  If the cancer has metastasized, it will show up on this scan and that means more surgery, or worse yet, no surgery depending on the location.  However, what I am believing for is a clean scan!   More patient waiting, but I plan to use it as a joy, peace-filled time!